The other morning there was a horrible traffic jam on the interstate. A tractor trailer had turned over, and the interstate would be closed off at that exit for a good 5 hours.
As I crept along at the 2 mph pace, I grew impatient. And a bit angry. I had places to be, and people to see. I did not have time to deal with this mess. My dramatic inner voice even said things like, “Oh, goodness, why me?” and “This is the end of the world, I have to get where I’m going!”
Unfortunately, the next exit was miles away and I had no choice but to deal with it.
Imagine if, in the face of this difficult traffic time, I had turned my car off and refused to drive another mile. I would have been an annoyance to all of the driving community, creating a completely unnecessary problem because life was not going my way at that particular point in time.
Fortunately, I had gotten out of the traffic jam before I could throw a tantrum. By the time I had gotten to the office, I had pretty much forgotten about my meltdown. The world did not end, and other than a few adjustments to my schedule life was back on track.
Ever had a fight with someone, particularly a spouse or close family member, that left you feeling like you were fighting through the world’s worst traffic jam? It was disheartening. You aren’t sure if you can deal with the hurtful words or the broken trust.
More than likely those difficult times eventually passed over. You and your loved ones got back on track, and life went on.
Every once in a while, though, we simply turn off our cars in the middle of a love traffic jam. Somehow we begin to think that a potential solution is to just quit playing. We give up on the people in our lives. We hold grudges. We tell our spouse, “I’m done”. We prefer to quit pressing forward, and hope that the world will calm down around us.
In a relationship, especially a marriage, we can’t ever believe that stopping is a solution. We must always remember that love is a journey you go on, and we have to keep on moving. The more we move, the more we keep focused on our goal of healthy relationships, the faster the traffic jam becomes a vague memory.
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January 22, 2009 at 8:31 pm
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